(This picture is from a recent trip I took to Nashville, Tennessee to do mission work there. THAT taught me about love. I'll have to tell you all about it in my upcoming posts, I just thought it was fitting.)
Why do we—those of us who claim to be Christians especially—allow
ourselves to treat others the way that we do? Why is it that instead of first
speaking to others with kindness, love, and compassion, we are always quick to judge,
to snap at others, to raise our voices and say something nasty, either with
just our tone or even with our actual words? Where is our patience? Where is
our human decency? I know that sounds a little harsh, and that sometimes we can
be provoked, but I haven’t even gotten to that yet. I’m just talking about the
way that we all—myself included—let our emotions and what is going on in our lives, our personal ones that we
probably don’t even tell other people about, change the way we talk to those
very same people.
Just because I’m frustrated about something doesn’t give me
the right to be frustrated at someone else who is just trying to help, whether I
want their help or not, whether they’re doing it right or not, it just doesn’t
matter. Just because I’m tired and I’ve had a long day doesn’t mean I get to
get annoyed at every little thing and snap at anyone who does something
annoying. Just because I’m sick and tired of something doesn’t mean I get to
act like I’m also sick and tired of anything someone else has to say. Since when
do we feel that we are allowed to treat others however we feel like at the
time? Since when are our emotions allowed to dictate how well we love another
person, how well we live out “love your neighbor as yourself” (Mark 12:31, NIV)?
Let me tell you something friends, this is not love! This is
NOT fulfilling God’s commandment! And
this is definitely not how Christ would have treated others. Even when
provoked, He never did anything out of anger, so why are we acting out of
anger, frustration, and any other emotion we have, especially when we’re not
being provoked? I understand that we’re human, and Jesus is the Son of God, but
we can’t let that be our excuse anymore. What ever happened to living our best
lives? What ever happened to trying our hardest to be like Jesus? What ever
happened to simply loving others the way He loves us (John 15:12, paraphrased)? 'Cause let me tell you, this isn’t it.
Loving others means putting them first, no matter what kind
of day you’re having, even if they never
put you first in return. In fact, love doesn’t even do anything for what it will get in return. Does Jesus dying for
sinners who will never, ever accept Him sound like it does? Love means just
taking your time—taking a second really—to think about what you are saying and
how it will make others feel before you say it. Before you use that tone. Because
just like those people never know what kind of day you have been having, or how
tired and frustrated and angry you are, you never know what kind of day they
have been having either. You see, this goes both ways. It’s not just you.
Words hurt. Believe me, I know. As someone who lived a good
portion of her adolescent years believing the lie that I wasn’t good enough,
wasn’t pretty enough, wasn’t smart enough, wasn’t fun enough, just wasn’t enough, I KNOW how a small, simple
little word can mean so much more to the person who hears it. You have NO IDEA
what someone else is going through, even if you think you do, even if they’ve
told you all their secrets. Because no matter how much truth they share, you
will NEVER be able to understand what they are feeling, even if you think you’ve
felt some of the same heartbreaks yourself. The feelings are always different. The
way they affect different people is always different, even in the smallest of
ways.
That is just one of the reasons why it is SO extremely
important that we are careful about the way that we treat others! Because it’s
not just what you say and the tone you use when you say it—even though those
two things alone can be enough to hurt someone and break down even just a tiny
piece of your relationship with them. But it’s also what those words, that
tone, mean in light of everything else that’s going on in their lives. Just like
we speak out of frustration even if our frustration comes from a totally
different situation that we’ve brought into the conversation with us, our
frustrated words can bring hurt to those we are speaking to because of the
other hurt they have tearing them up inside that may or may not even have
anything to do with the kind of frustration you’re showing. We’re just
compiling the hurt, adding more pain on top of the pain they already have to
carry. Why, why would we do that? Why would we EVER want to cause someone
additional pain?
Because we’ve never thought about it that way. We’re too
busy thinking about ourselves.
I could go on for so much longer about this topic. But I’m
not, I want to give you some time to think about what I’ve already said. Though
I’ve got a lot more where that came from, and I will be beginning to scratch the
surface with these upcoming “open heart” posts. Because I want us to live lives
that we love. I want us to live alive.
Not these dead shells that we’ve been living in, with our shut down hearts and
our lost childlike wonder and innocence. So, do me a favor, and really think
about what I’ve said. Let it change you. Because God didn’t call us to be the
same, He knows we all could use a little refining. It’s a good thing, you know.
So, be refined. Love people. And come
back next week if you want to hear more like this, and maybe even if you don’t,
because it just might be what God wants you to hear.
May God bless you and keep you,
Mackenzie Carol
To see where I’m linking up, check out my Where I Party
page.
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